Let's hear it one more time.

I've grown cold to the habit of selling myself short. I've become too use to knowing that stuff like this is inevitable. That when the going get's good i'll go stumbling down a flight of stairs. There are about 5 things that have gone beautifully perfect in this life but with each one comes a consequence that only feeds temporary happiness. Happiness? Define that, please. Almost like love .. . can it really exist? An illusion that we master is what traps us deep within the surface that we can't tell right from wrong anymore. "You just gotta pull through" Oh Yeah, let me get on that. Because all I have been doing is wasting my time. Destroying my organs with toxics and sharpening my skin with blades, clogging my throat with something more than bodily fluids. Seems I've found a worth in another substance. Difference now is, I don't go on my knees for your ego rush but for the one above to save me from myself. "Let go" I guess 8 months of pacing, therapy and faking the laughter means nothing. Patronizing advice is making me wanna pull the trigger. Making me wanna just give the world finger and tell everyone to FUCK THE RIGHT OFF! Don't talk to me, Don't pretend to care, Don't come over when it's convenient for you. I have already removed myself from the situation. Trust, it's a lie.